Can God really fix the broken?

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in Spirit.

Psalm 34:18

I have spent my previous 21 years believing in one simple lie: that I am not enough, that I will never be enough. I asked God constantly, will I ever fully be happy with myself? Will I ever be happy in general? I write today still wondering those same questions, however with a different heart then months ago. Before, I can truly say I was lost. A naive, sad girl who claimed to know Christ but did not want to accept the truths that came along with him. How in the world could one man have taken the burdens of every man in this world and still care for each and every one of them? How could one man love ME so much, after all my faults, and choose to die for MY sins. How could Jesus see me as a beautiful, worthy, loving soul and still want to fight for me? How? I couldn’t even love myself enough to accept those truths.

A couple of months ago, I was so hurt by the rejection and brokenness the world had to offer me. I assumed the suffering I went through was God’s way of telling me I was not fit to be his child, that I was just too much to deal with and I needed to find my own way. As a young girl, searching for any type of love, I spent countless nights questioning my own worth, crying myself to sleep. I felt so alone. The world was literally killing me inside. The hurt so deep I felt as if I would not make it another day. I let men treat me as if I was nothing, because in a way I saw myself as nothing. I pushed people away because I couldn’t face the possibility of betrayal or disappointment; I didn’t want another person to hurt me, to make me feel less. I pushed God away because I couldn’t fathom the fact that He could forgive for the girl I chose to be. The girl craving others love and acceptance so bad, she’d do anything, including denying the Lord himself.

May 2017, the month I left to Summer beach project in PCB, the month I decided to surrender fully to the Lord, the month I met an amazing set of people who wanted to grow with the Lord as well, the month that forever helped me realize just who God is. I can never forget. I spent days, fully invested in the Lord, constantly reading my Bible wanting to know more and more about Jesus. Also wanting to know more about what Jesus really thought of me. I was scared; what if I come to realize just how broken and selfish I am; what if I am not worthy enough to know God? Ephesians 4:18 states just how “wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.” Reading that on the 9th of July, after a long hard night before, I realized just how much Jesus did love me. He even loved me enough for the both of us! His love is that big, that amazing, that fruitful. I am undeserving of this, but God is so merciful, so gracious.

Today, I still suffer and doubt God, whether it be about my past or my future. I still suffer with feeling unworthiness, with rejection. But you know what keeps me going? Matthew 11:28 says “come to me, all you who are weary, and burdened, and I will give you rest.” God promises to one day take away all my suffering, to put me at rest, to live an eternal life with him in paradise. These promises are my hope that the life I live today will no longer matter in the days to come, and that’s enough for me.

So can God really fix the broken? Of course he can, you just need to have faith. In this life, things may never be easy, in fact I know I will have to face hardships in days to come. But FAITH in Christ, HOPE in the gracious One above, will give you the strength to push through.

36 thoughts on “Can God really fix the broken?

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  1. love this. one of my fav verses. i too struggle with unworthiness, rejection, lack of identity, etc. i have had similar experiences with men as well..giving them too much of me in search of feeling loved and valued. its a long road, but one worth pursing. our true identity is found in Christ alone…and just know you’re not alone in these struggles!

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  2. Remember faith is not something we “have.” Faith is not a noun it is an action. Each morning we get up and choose to believe….we may not feel it, we may not accept it at that moment …but we CHOOSE it. Then we go on with our day choosing each second to believe. Faith is a verb. Suzanne

    Liked by 5 people

  3. Thank you for sharing! You are beautiful inside and out! Growing up in a small village everyone knew everyone and I came from a poor family, but we were rich in love. It wasn’t until I was baptized that the desires of my heart in Him were revealed to me. He puts so many things on our hearts and sometimes simply by being alive His will is done. I saw one look at your face and smiled! I love your freckles and as a little girl I didn’t get freckles and I wanted them so bad. Now that I am older I love summers because I get blessed with summer freckles. You are very blessed and very loved! Keep up in His good works! Your story helped even me by simply reading it! Love and be beloved!

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Your testimony is full of encouragement and hope, leading others to the understanding that God is love and it’s a love absolutely, completely, forever, unconditional, freely given from our Heavenly Father who calls us His beloved! Can’t wait to hear of the amazing blessings headed your way as you continue your walk with Him!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Awesome!!!!!
    Amazing Grace….He loves us more than we could ever love ourselves..
    Abba Father! God bless you for this piece…
    I was just talking to a friend about how broken I am this morning and I saw your post..
    God has us in mind!!
    I am Oluwasikemi and I am striving to be like Jesus daily..
    You Can reach out to me on oluwasikemi.gloria@lmu.edu.ng
    Let us grow together!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. This is a beautiful post and I’m so glad you are finding healing in God’s love for you! Recently, my counselor had me write out 1 Cor. 13:4-8 as a love letter from God to me, and from me to myself. At first I thought the exercise was kind of simplistic – I already knew the verses very well. But as I wrote out “God is patient with Laura. God is kind to Laura. etc. and “Laura is not easily angered with herself.” “I am not rude to myself.” a transformation took place. I began to see the areas where I still hadn’t fully grasped God’s love for me (and therefore my inability to fully love myself) and I now live in the depth of his love. I highly recommend the exercise – it seems you’re well on your way, but maybe this will bring you to the next step. Thank you so much for checking out my blog. I’m glad you found it helpful. I pray all God’s best for you!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Self-worth starts with doubts and doubts starts with lies feed to us in whispers from the enemy whose name I will not utter
    Praise God He loved us all imperfect as we all are, and taught you just how much He loves you
    May God continue to strengthen your faith and continue to bless you

    Liked by 1 person

  8. This is splendid! Your authenticity shines through. The word satan literally means “the accuser”. I’m glad you came to accept how precious you are to our beloved Abba. Thank you for sharing your journey. May God continue to bless and keep you as you glorify him through your gifts!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Oh my gosh! LOVE this. So real and honest. Thank you for posting this. I am so glad to join WordPress. I am finding other Christians who struggle in similar ways as me. And it is very freeing. God bless you ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  10. This is such a touching article! To be honest, I am in that current season of life where I am wrestling with God about going into the healing process. I encourage you to keep on trusting God because He is merciful and faithful. Even in my stubbornness, He is still guiding me and placing people in my life to guide me in the right direction. So, from one girl on a healing journey to another, just remember that God is with you and He will never leave your side.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so glad you took the time to read and comment! Thank you so much and although our sufferings are unfortunate, the fact that we get to pursue Christ eternally is so much more than anything else. God bless you Beautiful!

      Like

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